I'm not surprised

Today was so draining!

IDK I just had no energy today. I felt so tired (and for some reason I couldn't even take a nap), I felt like my insides were shaking, it was an ugly feeling. But than again it was probably the hangover taking it's toll. I'm fine now but my whole day was wasted.

And surprise surprise!

After hearing through family gossip, my grandparents won't help me out with my car.

Well let's just say I'm not surprised about there decision.

But I think it's sort of unfair. I mean they get my uncles and aunty cars all the time (even my cousins!) and they always find ways to wreck there cars. Like my cousin took of with my aunty's car one time and he ended up empty on gas so he left it there, the next morning the car was set on fire.

They also get my cousins computers, mp3s, phones, motor bikes, A FUCKING PONY!!!
Taking them to Arizona and las vegas!

And I barley ask for anything from them!

And when I ask, there answer is always NO!

I get it!
That's there favourite grandkids. Whatever help I need doesn't matter to them.It's so stupid! I mean I go to school full-time, I don't have any kids and I'm not trying to get pregnant, I'm not a all out party girl (like my mom). And yet my cousins are doing the opposite of what I'm doing, they barley go to school, they go out and party and do drugs, they have kids they aren't even taking care of. Is something wrong with this view?

Well whatever!

I'm use to this, it's always been this way all my life but I just never had the chance to say it. I tried to work with them on a repayment plan or anyway to pay them back, But all I get is a big fat NO!

Oh well I figure out a new way to fix or get a new car.
I've been thinking of just getting new credit cards getting the cash advance to get a new car. Sure I'll most likely be in debt for like 10 years or longer, but I really do need a car.
I don't know? It's just an idea.

Or either getting a loan?

I don't know? These are all ideas. I haven't made up my mind on anything yet.

I got a lot to think about. Hopefully tomorrow I can have some new ideas.


xoxo