2018 update, new date lol

Well it's been this long since i've been back.

2 years I think?

LOL whatever, at least I'm back.

Ive changed a lot, I'll admit I was a hard drinker (like everyday hardcore), and I was to smoke everyday (more like to every 45 mins a day). But I cut down a huge amount in October. And now everyone is so surprised I made these so "hardcore" decisions. It wasn't hard for me to do all that. I was never really addicted. Smoking or liquor. I just had a unhealthy habit, dealing with problems or emotions like this.
But now i was down, finished, it all bore me. I quit within the first week. I was really bored.

Now strangely, I developed a online shopping addiction, lol (well better than before lol!)
Bet those who know me, asked me, how I kicked it.
Well all I can say......... I was never addicted. I know myself, I was just bored. I even quit cigarettes, it wasn't hard. Like I said, I was bored.

Thats one of the things I hate about me, and love.

Normal people will have some sort of addiction, that will cause them trouble.
I'm not, I just get very bored. I'm not weak-minded. I sort of wished i was.
I'm saying this, cause my family is going thru this problem. I wish i can lend them my strength, mentally.

Well thanks for hearing my rant for tonight.

Sky

December something update lol

Christmas is over, I got nothing I wanted, of course everyone gets what they don't want LOL!

Well over here in Morley, Alberta. I went for a drive to the "ghost" let's just say I almost couldn't get out of my drive way, and the roads was bad (like you can barley see them cuz of the blowing snow across it, so you can't see the lines.) I barley made it home, I was basically  in the middle of the road the entire time (my motto, if they see me, they better get out of the way, or go in the ditch cuz I'm not moving! LOL!)

But I made it back home!

I'm selfish, rude. I will do anything to do what I want to do. Just so I'm not bored. I get bored really easily. But when it comes to people I actually care about I really try to make an effort. Sometimes it's hard. But I always try to make it work.

It feels like I gotta redo everything now, since the new year is gonna start. I'm not afraid of that.
I just heard that my best friend is gonna be spending new years in quebec. I hope to see her soon before that, once I'm not scared of driving into the city (she always drove for me anyways) so can you see how scared I am.

I miss you Tish, I wish I can see you. I miss our 3 fun buddies (tish, weis and me). LOL!
OH God!!!!!

It feels like this wind it will blow down my house!!!!!!!!

Oh and last minute update! I'm watching House!!!!!!!
Love that show!!!!!!

Finally a new year!

Well it's a new year!

I can't believe the year went by so quickly! But I have a new motto. NEW YEAR! NEW ME! (and this time I'm dedicated to that!) New routine, be more focused, etc. I'm excited about it!

And I will be getting my new ride soon! I just have to wait for my dad to get back to me. I'm very excited about that!

I just have to teach myself how to get up early (it's a struggle cuz I love my sleep LOL!)

I'm just so glad elections and Christmas are over (FINALLY!) it was filled with drama and stupidity! BTW congrats grandpa for getting back in! I'm proud you took the high road a chose to ignore all those nasty rumors and gossip your competitors were spreading about you (at least someone took the mature way of handling it!). OMG! You wouldn't believe the stuff they were saying about him, all the lies! they were just trying to make him look bad so he can lose the elections, it was very unprofessional and it just showed how immature their campaign was. But in the end he won fair and square! I'm so proud of him!

And TBH I wouldn't want to vote for someone that spent all the band's money and made the band almost be broke! (Yes the competitor did that 4-5 years ago when he was in term, and he still has no explanation to where the money went.) And you never talked about the issues and what he was willing to do for the whole community to improve, only relied on gossip and lies to win this race. To me that's not a leader. And I'm thinking others started to see that too.

Well the drama is over with and we can all get back to normal! For at least for another 4 years then the drama will start up all over again!

Well this is gonna be a short post! I'll keep you updated!

xoxo    

Happy New Year Everyone!

Finally no more of being a DUMBASS!!!

Well things have changed over the summer,

ALOT of stuff has happened!

From moving out of my house for 7 weeks (cuz my house need to be fixed) to the trailers, then moving back in, to school starting, crashing my car, schooling starting, to ending of an relationship. YEAH!!! ALOT of stuff has happened!!!!

But after all this, I just realized......... I need to get my life back on track!

It's werid! You would think all of these things would affect me emotionally, But it dosen't! It dosen't bother me. I just realized what my priorities are, and what needs to get done first. it's a werid truth. I never thought i would need all of this stuff happening to me first just to see it. I think now I can focus on it you know?

 Alot of things need to get done, it's all jumbled in my head! Ok one thing at a time, I should write this all down LOL!

Thanksgiving was fun! Ate alot, hanged around with the family. I just wished I could of taken home some stuffing! It's like a huge fight just to get it! LOL!

Well just at school now trying to get shit done, But OMG! It's so hard to concentrate! There are screaming kids just going crazy! And the mothers don't even tell them to stop or shut up! FUCK!
I'm so close to snapping!
I get it, your allowed to bring ur kids to school with you but this is too much! BE A MOM! OTHER PEOPLE ARE TRYING TO WORK TOO!!! Shit find a fucking babysitter!

I can handle the screaming for an hour or 2 but when it's 5 FUCKING HOURS! I'm ready to pull my hair out!!!!!

The worst part is when it's everyday! From monday to friday! I swear I'll be deaf by the end of the year.

Some people don't even think about the others around them! seesh!!!!


xoxo

I'm not surprised

Today was so draining!

IDK I just had no energy today. I felt so tired (and for some reason I couldn't even take a nap), I felt like my insides were shaking, it was an ugly feeling. But than again it was probably the hangover taking it's toll. I'm fine now but my whole day was wasted.

And surprise surprise!

After hearing through family gossip, my grandparents won't help me out with my car.

Well let's just say I'm not surprised about there decision.

But I think it's sort of unfair. I mean they get my uncles and aunty cars all the time (even my cousins!) and they always find ways to wreck there cars. Like my cousin took of with my aunty's car one time and he ended up empty on gas so he left it there, the next morning the car was set on fire.

They also get my cousins computers, mp3s, phones, motor bikes, A FUCKING PONY!!!
Taking them to Arizona and las vegas!

And I barley ask for anything from them!

And when I ask, there answer is always NO!

I get it!
That's there favourite grandkids. Whatever help I need doesn't matter to them.It's so stupid! I mean I go to school full-time, I don't have any kids and I'm not trying to get pregnant, I'm not a all out party girl (like my mom). And yet my cousins are doing the opposite of what I'm doing, they barley go to school, they go out and party and do drugs, they have kids they aren't even taking care of. Is something wrong with this view?

Well whatever!

I'm use to this, it's always been this way all my life but I just never had the chance to say it. I tried to work with them on a repayment plan or anyway to pay them back, But all I get is a big fat NO!

Oh well I figure out a new way to fix or get a new car.
I've been thinking of just getting new credit cards getting the cash advance to get a new car. Sure I'll most likely be in debt for like 10 years or longer, but I really do need a car.
I don't know? It's just an idea.

Or either getting a loan?

I don't know? These are all ideas. I haven't made up my mind on anything yet.

I got a lot to think about. Hopefully tomorrow I can have some new ideas.


xoxo